Friday, September 29, 2006

Friday
29.09.06

MARK THIS DAY.

the last practical exam i'll ever have with 05v13.
the last dinner cooked by our maid.
the last time i'll be able to scream DIYAHHHHHH when there's a cockroach around. *wince*

well, so practical was pretty okay, besides the post-chem-practical zinc-aluminium stressout, and the post-physics-practical divide-by-cm-or-metre stressout. yeah. and, of course, the post-last-practical blues i'm suffering now. which only came about ten minutes ago. because of the second "last" (how ironic. second last. anyway..) so, yes, anyway, that brings me to the main issue.

MY MAID'S LEAVING TOMORROW!!! =((((( rarrrr i like her a LOT =( and she's really really really nice sigh gonna miss her alot. especially, well, during next week when no one else's at home when i'm back early after exams, during the afternoons when it's just daniel her and me around... okay you get the idea. i mean, i knew she was leaving in sept (its the twenty-ninth, i should have realised) but it never quite hit me til now. (okay, mum mentioned it a couple of weeks back, i believe. but i forgot. gah.)
=( cos her sister can no longer look after her son and she has to go back etc etc. (funny how the same thing happened to my grandma's maid and my aunt's maid at the same time. some family crisis, anyway.) but yeah, the point is, i'm really gonna miss her. never see her again!! boohoo =( i mean, when she went back before it wasn't so bad cos, well, i knew we'd be getting another maid and well i dunno it just wasn't. okay that's bad, as if she's replaceable, all the maids are interchangeble and all... not really like that. to be real honest it IS abit cos of that, but the point is i really really like her. she wasn't like the other maids who were rude or sloppy or who cooked horribly/packed horribly/got irritated really easily. and i trusted her, she'd help me find stuff and pass me back money i left in my uniform pocket and i could talk to her and she'd joke with me (like that time she pointed out that the contents of the larder don't change when i looked into it for the fifth time that afternoon. lol i never realised i had a habit of just looking into the larder for no reason til then.). not like the last maid who stole, had a bf etc etc.. oh well. after that trip to the catholic association that helps maids i was more sympathetic and all, but yeah I MISS DIYAH ALREADY =((( wahhh sad.
haha i realised this is a very no-point post. but wth.

bye...

*waves*

Posted by nayrakroarual at 8:04 PM

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Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Tuesday
26.09.06


for you.
hope you're doing alright.


Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Be strong, believe
Be strong, Believe.

Posted by nayrakroarual at 8:18 PM

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Thursday, September 21, 2006

Wednesday
20.09.06


IT'S OVER. PRAISE GOD.

haha so it wasn't the best it could have been, i definitely had better days. on the other hand, it was quite good and really fun. thank GOD that mrs lim came with me haha helped me sew my shoe elastics and tie my hair haha and yeah i really felt more confident that way with her there and all. i went in with two crestar girls and cheryl (from scgs, sec3 not the j1 one, taking ballet with ms cheah now *nostalgia nostalgia*) haha so they weren't the best (or maybe my expectations are overly high, not having been to sba for a while, but i do remember everyone there being better? haha i dunno. i suppose cos they (my old sba class) are taking advanced found this year so they would definitely be better by now. haha. anyway, i wobbled quite badly during foite of adagio in the centre, but i managed to regain my balance so i suppose it was still alright. OH i hopped like crazy for my first double pirouette ARRGHH but after that it was fine. haha i got a HUGE shock the crestar girls were VERY flow-y i don't know how they managed to turn and all without all that placement in the upper body but they seemed to do quite well all the same! haha. oh the dance was hilarious. when the no.9 girl, nicola, started, and she did the starting really differently from the way i had been taught, sweeping one arm only, and i could tell that that wasn't what cheryl had learnt either cos she shot me this really shocked big-eyes look (none of us were stupid enough to whisper or show too much expression while waiting) hahahhahaha and i just grinned back and shrugged a bit - i'd rather been expecting this, from having girls from other schools come in and take class with us before and taking class at scgs. haha cheryl danced the dance beautifully. she really improved heaps since she was a sec 1 in scgs. seriously. haha scgs does that to you. God, i miss it... anyway, before my dance, cheryl like wished me good luck (i can't really remember how she managed it without talking and gesturing more than a bit, but yeah she did, sort of smile-thumbsup-nod SO NICE LA haha rocks =) ...so we danced our dances in all different ways, but i suppose it was more interesting for the examiner that way lol. everyone looked really nice and seemed to have a lot of fun, even though i still prefer watching yomiko or even haruka (when she's not tired that is) do their dance. yeap. OH and my pointe was just DISASTROUS i tell you. i got releve devant and derriere WHY THE HELL COULDN'T I GET ESCHAPPES GAH anyway so i just hopped the best i could haha and prayed she saw my ankle guard LOL haha and i fell off pointe but i couldn't really help that. pas de bourre peke i fell off as well, but i'd not expected to hold up after tonlea and all anyway. haha. im just hoping i did well enough in the rest of the exam to redeem myself. quite depressing to think that i worked so hard just to redeem myself from pointe. or i could actually have gotten a merit or something. but no, now i'm hoping to pass. sigh. haha. last year not one of the sba girls got lower than highly commended. sighh...
haha i met weiqin (minyi's year in scgs, danced in the green-dress dance and i THINK ease on down as well haha in the concert in my sec2 year) on the way in! haha as in she was in the exam just before me! haha quite cool she looked up and said "you look VERY familiar" to me hahha and i said yeah so do you haha you're from scgs right and yeah anyway it was cool. then, on my way out i met stephanie (big stephanie i still remember ms cheah used to call her haha) from my old sba class going in for the next exam. at first i was really shocked then i realised she was going in for the advanced found exam haha righttt, laura, stupid you didn't realise they'd have moved on by now? oh well. haha. so overall the exam was fun =) quite nice yayyy

and now i want to thank all the wonderful people who really encouraged me and helped a lot and also those who wished me luck, it really helped me not too panic and (SORT OF) keep my cool before the exam (although that was also in part because i didn't want to freak out in front of the other girls and mrs lim hahaha) yeah so anyway it really really encouraged me, =) thanks:

mrs lim!! thank you thank you thank you for teaching me and sending me in even though i might not make it and all and putting your best into it and helping me so much =) (and yes i realised you can't read this oh well =( hahaha)
papa! for being so wonderful and getting me subway cookies the night before =) specially to cheer me up haha and sms-ing me too =)
mummy! yeah. for, um, being mummy. right...
christine! thanks so much for the PLUFBEB haha it REALLY REALLY helped *hugs* thanks so so so so much!! you rock =) i was really touched *awwww* hahaha but seriously, thanks...
cousin michelle! haha bet you did great for YOUR exam (okay im sorry i didnt get up in time to sms you that day =( but yeah thanks so much *hugs* haha rocks being in your ballet class) thanks!
michelle zhuang for giving me all your luck in one of your wonderful hugs =) haha although you still managed to not fall down right haha
pamela =) for helping me do my hair in school and wishing me luck and everything haha and being so amused at me being a ballerina (*bsh*)
xinhui for all the psyching-up and encouragement and messages to cheer me up and encourage *hugs* thanks so so much aXis!
christelle (from ballet) for asking for my number the day before and then sms-ing and wishing me luck that day!! thank's so much =)) yayy i was quite touched haha
lucinda lam! haha for remembering to sms even with your prelims and everything *hugs* yayy you rock thanks so much =) haha (AND BEFORE YOU ASK, DAVID'S FINE. haha)
mel for remembering and asking me how it went =D haha and confusing me like anything cos i couldn't tell it was you at first LOL
chunhan for asking if i was scared I WAS, DAMN SCARED, THANKS and making me go into the pre-exam-panic mode early -_- and for wishing me luck =) anyway it meant alot, thanks, chunhan
yirui for wishing me luck! even though i was halfway out of class already =) oh btw you've seen swan lake before? Oo haha yayyy anyway i was really encouraged by you =) thanks!
nazri for wishing me luck and remembering to ask me the next day even though you wouldn't understand what i said about it hahaha =) thanks naz it meant a lot to me
yijin, xijiao, jastine, althea, deejee and all the rest of the people who wished me luck (i'm really sorry if i can't remember =P i was kind of freaking out) thank you! =)

i love you all =)

Posted by nayrakroarual at 9:28 PM

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Monday, September 18, 2006

Monday
18.09.06

wonder what it's like to fall in love.
wonder what it's like to have someone fall in love with you.
wonder what it's like to break someone's heart.
wonder what it's like to have your heart broken.
wonder what it's like to know you'll never matter to someone.
wonder what it's like to have someone never matter to you.
wonder, wonder what it's like.

wonder what it's like to have a foot that curves when you point it.
wonder what it's like to have a hip that turns out when you're asleep.
wonder what it's like to have a stomach to small it lies flat when you're sitting.
wonder what it's like to have fingers that create perfection.
wonder what it's like to have eyes that hold the stars.
wonder what it's like to have a dance that could make someone cry.
wonder what it's like to have a smile that others love.

wonder, oh wonder what it's like.

some dreams live on in time forever
those dreams you want with all your heart
and i'll do whatever it takes
follow through with the promise i made
put it all on the line what i hoped for at last would be mine
if i could reach higher
just for one moment touch the sky
from that one moment in my life
i'm gonna be stronger
know that i've tried my very best
put my spirit to the test
if i could reach

some days are meant to be remembered.
those days, we rise above the stars
so i'll go the distance this time
seeing more the higher i climb
that the more i believe, all the more that this dream will be mine!

Posted by nayrakroarual at 11:07 PM

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Saturday, September 16, 2006

Saturday
16.09.06



do you know the deepest wish of your heart?

Posted by nayrakroarual at 9:28 PM

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Sunday, September 10, 2006

Sunday
10.09.06

haha. eight hours ago, i was going crazy. "ten ten ten ten ten" was all over my msn nickname and my mind too. but hey, you know what? it's cool. no big deal. "it's just a stupid exam," as mrs Lim said.
Today's class was great. especially so in comparison to last week's set of lessons in which i really dipped - every time i went home i felt like crying and breaking my own ankles/toes/whatever. well, almost, it's quite unlikely that i'd be that tolerant of pain huh XD. anyway, today mrs lim was really happy she said i got the performance back and i was really happy too cos the whole way there i was pyscho-ing myself "happy happy happy" "relax relax relax" and yeah man it worked haha last lesson, she told me, "Laura, you really need to RELAX. just forget about it. it's just a stupid exam." and then i missed class due to a stupid headache yesterday. AND HEY class rocked today! yayyy thanks God =) and xinhui who told me a joke to cheer me up, and dawn who made me realise there's so much more to life than our own little spheres, that things could really be so much worse. =) yay. haha today mrs lim said "good girl" like quite a few times in the "it's really getting better" rather than the "ummm okayyyyyy" kinda way she usually does for me and COOL STUFF she pulled me out with Yomiko and Haruka to do the fouette of adagio XD haha okay im not boasting, she nearly always pulls out haruka and yomiko for nearly every exercise, but cool stuff haha it's been such an eternity since i was actually supposed to demonstrate something that i can't remember when the last time was. haha. forgive a dancer's ego.
mrs lim said something that i really thought was meaningful. you know how the saying always goes, "dance like nobody's watching"? well she said, "if nobody's watching you, what's the point?" And, well, i just think it's true. for me at least.

dance like the whole world's watching.

-----------------------

oh bible time was hilarious tonight. we were reading from deuteronomy 5, the ten commandments and all. then when mum asked if there were any questions,
David: "What's do not commit adultery?"
Mum: "Oh, well, when you marry a person you promise not to--"
*pause* haha wonder how you're gonna get out of this one, mum.
"--umm, not to fall in love or like anyone else." right, good save there.
David: "Oh."
*pause*
"Then can i marry myself?"

haha. my baby brother is really hilarious sometimes. it's times like these, i'm actually glad he exists. (although it's not very nice to think how he came to exist, but let's not go there, shall we...) haha yay God rocks. =)

Posted by nayrakroarual at 10:16 PM

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Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Wednesday
06.09.06

It's quite a cool date, don't you think? haha. anyway, i know i'm kinda late (12hours, infact) but
GOOD LUCK MICHELLE!! *hugs* all the best okay!! you go girl. haha.
oh, and i heard the examiner's nice and you got pas de chats for your free allegro =/ i don't really like pas de chats but i guess it's better than brises or balances X( haha that's what sudhee reported =/

haha i kinda miss the times when we talked ballet 50% of the time, dance 50% of the time and concerts 20% of the time. oh wait, that's 120%. well, they overlap. bet you all have no idea what a corps de ballet is. (it's what i can never even hope to be. unfortunately.) or a pas de deaux XD (which i've never done. we need more guys doing ballet man.)

oo anyway i haven't much more to say. but since everyone's doing that ten people thing i shall do it too! haha and i shall be controversial and include answers and you can guess! yayy. or maybe i wont bother. loll.

1. AWWWWW thanks so much!! *hugs* yayyy

2. my roof doesn't leak! (and you just signed online haha)

3. what in the world is bleach? (besides a washing agent thingy)

4. Summer Tree Wandering Fire Darkest Road GUY GAVRIEL KAY and i want it back!! =(

5. i don't know if you even care, but i still pray for you. =) More Than Life

6. HOW DID IT GO HOW DID IT GO TIPS TIPS =D

7. yes, david's cough is better. -_-

8. yayyy =) i hope you get it right by sunday haha choose an easier one next time! -.-

9. Get well soon! =)

10. IIIITTTT'S NAZRI!! (okay don't ask i just felt like doing that haha the great justice just got online too XD talk about good timing)

Posted by nayrakroarual at 10:48 PM

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Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Tuesday
05.09.06

i don't know how i do it.

Honestly, you know, it's absolutely mystifying. My incredible capacity to misplace things is seriously beyond me. Take today, for instance. I was being a good girl and, as my mum suggested, actually looking at my files and attempting to create exam scopes for my subjects. So far, i've completed Lang Arts and Chemistry. (and nearly died from dust inhalation on the way...) The thing is, sometime in the middle of drawing a line down the middle of my chemistry scope page, and drawing a line down the same of my physics scope, i lost my pencil and ruler. They're not around me on the floor, they're not in the chemistry file or any other file i opened today, and they're not in my pencil box, and WHAT THE HELL i didn't move from the floor la RARRR seriously its MYSTIFYING and quite irritating too, i might add. i started out today with 3 plastic rulers and two pencils (my pencil and ruler being the things i am most prone to misplace) and now i have only one ruler and one pencil. wth?!

Posted by nayrakroarual at 2:20 PM

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Monday, September 04, 2006

Monday
04.09.06

went back to scgs today
how long since i stepped into
that huge, impersonal dance studio
since i saw myself a tiny figure
amidst the infinity of mirrors
since i waltzed across the floor
without a care at all to fall
since the sweatmark where i sat
was showed by the black dance mat
what i have been
what i have seen
what i have done
what i have become
went back to scgs today

--------------------------------

actually, i admire you alot
i have seen the kind of life you lead
i'd give anything for it
it may be tiring living up to all the expectations,
i sure would be
but you manage it well
and hey
at least you've got something to live up to
something to live for

--------------------------------

i started out thinking it would be different everytime
but all the time they seem to be parallel
i cant account for it
i need a way out
perhaps a hard slap on the face
or something else ...
or someone else ...
life was simpler then - it was easier to be a saint, a floater, a neutral party (switzerland XD), whatever you call it, there. life is easier when you just talk, or just don't talk, or just dance, or just play, or just complain, or just study... when the hell did it get so complicated that you think? the unexamined life is not worth living, the examined life is not livable...

--------------------------------

went back to scgs today...


credits: d-a-o.blogspot.com

Posted by nayrakroarual at 8:59 PM

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Babel




things to do before i die