Saturday, May 21, 2005
Saturday
21.05.05
thursday 19.05.05
NSW science test. stirred up memories i thought had i had long given up. ...do you remember?friday, 22 Oct 04.
"today we had the EL MOE survey. hah. "surevey"...TEST, more like. anyway, the test was one and a half hourse. but by the time i finished the test and checked 3 times carefully, i still had like half an hour left. so BORED. so was everyone else! felly(felicia)'s whole ROW was sleeping openly on their table, with their heads all in the same position! haha i started laughing cos it looked so funny. then YB who was on my right looked and started laughing too.
then i started building a pen tower. but my table was slanted so it was hard--the markers all rolled off. haha. then all of a sudden YB like handed me 3 of her pens. then more, and more. the rekha also started giving me her pens. even rach leong whom i dont really know passed me 2 pens. the whole front section had noticed and was laughing silently by now. i nearly toppled the tower when i saw fersha grinning from the other side of the isle. continued building. then i realised the whole LT, including he 2 moe teachers, was watching me. mersa later told me she heard one whisper to another, "where did she get so many pens?" haha. when i exhausted the supply i set back and gave a sigh. and for some reason the whole LT started laughing. haha. for the record, the tower was nearly 20cm high.before the next paper, lorraine and jean passed me some of their pens (for the 'Laura pen tower building fund'). OP put a lot of pens on the empty seat next to her but she fell asleep so YB reached over and took them later. it was very amusing when she woke up and realised they were gone. ahha. Dawn and Clare were like blowing at the tower to get it to fall from a good seven rows back. -.- . haha. when the teacher collected my paper i was like oh NO cos i realised the pen tower was on top of my paper. haha. it was damn funny.so fun.
Posted by nayrakroarual at 10:10 PM
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Friday, May 13, 2005
Friday
13.05.05
ROCK CLIMBING CLUB ROCKED!!!
okay, so i missed the debate partly because of that, and i feel real guilty about that. but well, rcc did rock. (the irony...)
the front part...okay lets be honest it was boring but in the end cos everybody is so nice and so much fun so it was fun in the end. lol. esp the gym-station. haha.
i like it when nazri or aaron belay me. maybe because to SOME extent i trust them? (*raises brows skeptically*)
but really. i do trust them, sort of. and they were very nice belayers. actually, come to think of it, maybe nazri wasnt the one belaying me. hmm. but he is still a nice, erm, "senior" rcc-er. he helped me to find stones to hold and all and called out instructions spontaneously when he saw i was getting stuck. ohhh so is clarissa she was really encouraging and nice!!! and when aaron belayed me halfway i was stuck then he helped me from then on he was really nice and encouraging too. =D
you know, i never really realised how scared i am of heights. i mean, sure, i got awfully uncomfortable during dance when i had to dance right at the edge of the stage, but that is totally different. i make it up tp the overhang, then as i place my footing and all i glimpse the ground FAR FAR below. i start to panic. plus by this time i'm very tired. so no energy to help me, only technique. which all goes away when my arms start to quiver and my heart starts to race. i climb up the rock wall and i freak out. wonderful... *makes a face*
Posted by nayrakroarual at 10:57 PM
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Friday
13.05.05
lazy. pampered. selfish. irresponsible. self-centred. insensitive. vain. hypocritical. mean. obstinate. tense. judgemental. arrogant.
i can't seem to do anything right. don't get me wrong. i'm not depressed or angsty or fishing for compliments. but yeah. i've been acting like a b*****, i know it, and i sincerely want to change.
so.
chien wei, shi wei, xiao xian and all the aquila house comm people: i really am sorry about the debate thingy, us not turning up and all. it was really irresponsible of me, i acknowledge that am i really hope that you can forgive me.
xtine, chun han and yang yi: sorry for not thinking about your feelings and situation and all. i realise that you guys have been getting like the worst seats and all in class. i know it's a bit late to make up for that. i didn't realise you guys minded so much, and i'm sorry for being so insensitive. hope you can accept my apology.
yirui: sorry about being so bossy and close-minded about IkiMasho. i really really appreciate all you've been doing--i think we all do. thanks for doing such a great job!!
mel: thank you for remembering me, and always being there for me. you've really encouraged me and given me lots of great advice, or just listened to my random rantings. thanks for being such an understanding, caring friend.
lucinda: thanks for remembering me too, you really cheer me up! THANK YOU for not wallowing in "are you okays?" but just living normally and showing concern even without saying things as such.
to someone. : i'm sorry for always snapping at you and putting you down, even when i don't mean to. please accept my apology. no hard feelings?
once again, to all the people who made me smile.mark, gillian, yi jin, samuel, xin hui, pamela, clarissa, dennis, aaron, benjamin, nazri, gerry, mel, luc, rudolf.
Posted by nayrakroarual at 9:19 PM
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Thursday
12.05.05
i was waiting all half-week, and it RAINED on tuesday, so i couldn't climb the rock wall.
i was waiting all week, and debate was CANCELLED.
i've been waiting all nearly-all-week, and tomorrow i have interhouse debate so i can't go for RCC.
what a week. *glares at nobody in particular*
speaking of glaring...
no hard feelings. okay?
lorttnwth (list of random things that nobody wants to hear)1. i figured out why there are so many badminton rackets hanging outside LT4. cos the badminton must have gotten CCA lockers there.
2. found 9 RCC posters. after 7 days. lol.
oo. CT invest full dress rehearsal. forgot to bring tie. hurry called male welf to loan extra tie. ran to locker, retrieved tie, ran back to PT. realised i didnt know how to tie a tie. lol.
Posted by nayrakroarual at 2:07 AM
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Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Thursday11.05.05i was in such a good mood can. dance went wonderfully, so did ctc.but no, somebody had to come along and utterly destroy my mood.actually, i'm as cross with myself for letting that person do that, but i cant really change the past, can i?I AM SO GONNA KILL YOU.on a lighter note, debate is tomorrow!! *cheers happily*
Posted by nayrakroarual at 10:34 PM
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Monday, May 02, 2005
Monday
02.05.05
- adapted from arrythm-
I hate it, hate your smiles and remarks directed at others because I know they’re not meant for me. I hate the people who receive them, and hate myself for hating them. Hate myself, for being so pathetic and needing your approval, for being so weak. It hurts to remember our friendship, to think back and remember in tortured pain all the memories, even those painful in themselves. It hurts when I try to give you up and fail so miserably at it, because every time I force myself to stop, just stop, you give me another measure of hope, another glimpse of a could-have-been, another thin slice of light for a friendship lost.-dedicated to the sc-netballers. because i remember, even when you forget-do you remember playing bridge endlessly at night?do you remember dissing chan everytime dawn or minyi got into ANOTHER dance?do you remember the hours spent waiting in the front of the studio, sometimes snacking, sometimes gossiping, sometimes stretching, but mostly just sitting together in silence, because we weren't good enough to be in the dance?do you remember the first lesson with xu jie?do you remember the rushing to make-up, the rush to change, the rush to help others get ready for their dance while we watched?do you remember the times we declared we would quit, only to change our minds every time?do you remember all the times we spent together laughing, talking, being friends?do you remember rushing for cca together?do you remember all hogging the toilet because we had to change?do you remember the endless debate, week after week, about whether or not to wear tights?do you remember the routine exercises we were so sick of, that i now regret not treasuring?do you remember the horrible costumes?do you remember the aching muscles and the tired smiles?do you remember?i remember.-dedicated to the sc dancers. because i will forever carry the scars of the could-have-beens-
Posted by nayrakroarual at 11:32 PM
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Monday02.05.05oh, my GOD.wow.
Posted by nayrakroarual at 10:05 PM
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Sunday, May 01, 2005
sunday
01.05.05
YOUTH SUNDAY ROCKED LAR.
whee. didnt really like the sermon, compared to last year's or this year's easter one, but then i like rev burke(and am prejudiced against rev phoon). no denying, the easter convention guy rocked though. did last year too. i cant wait for the cd to be out!!!
we went too fast for "come into his presence" but aiyah wth right? haha and steph and serene were great and KEXIN TOTALLY ROCKED. she reads so well can. haha.
sarah sings super well. pearlyn too. and dawn & lucas.... *faints*
ehh they are really damn good. remember when lucas sang on the way back from pontian "hearts production" and he sang "music of the night" i was like MELTING (we all were) haha josh was being spastic trying to be funny "i'm in love"..DOTS but yeah he's really that good. and he can act so well?? TALK ABOUT TALENT. *faints again*
then we went out josh (woo not lim) was super lame can telling us all the pick-up lines....i SHALL NOT repeat them. and roo is super nice. sigh. haha
whee. had lots of fun lar. i remembered why i didnt try joining sc cell group/ michelle's cell group when i was like really drifting. because its only at orpc i grew up there i KNOW the people. plus of course now i'm scared of jinglin and i think i'll be too extra. and i dun think i could join mich's cg. maybe i'll just go there, as in go by myself and sit by myself. for once i wouldnt have to worry about who sees me and what i do. (although i will have to be careful not to bump into jinglin or michelle...lol yes they ARE that scary.)
but thinking abt fcbc, i suddenly remembered some stuff.
i've had a few "conversions", or at least, lots of times i "asked Christ into my heart".
1 - read that book from the church library. yeah. shant bore you with details, but it got me crying. i was primary sch then.
2 - 2002. good friday, auntie jen gave her testimonial. i cried, hid it away though...
3 - 2003. followed mich to FCBC. it was some outreach thing, i THINK--easter again if im not wrong. the msg was abt surrender...surrendering your life to God. pastor khong. haha i still remember we were sitting in the second row on the right, and the sc cell group, of which i only knew steph yee and leanne, were sitting in front on the left, waving flags and stuff. i think leanne also had this extra huge one. it felt like a cult, coming in late and wallking through the largest church i had ever seen besides the easter convention. the poster-things on the wall, everyone singin their hearts out, people kneeling, praying, lifting their hands... at the end of the service, when they asked those who wanted to accept christ to come forward, i wanted to go down. but malu, cos michelle beside me, and im the one who's been urging her to come church since forever, and all...but i prayed too, and yeah...i think i cried but managed to hide it from her. haha. didnt know jinglin or joanne then.
4 - 2004, 5 june. festival of praise, hillsongs. i hadnt even heard of them, but cheryl tan(my old idol, yes) invited me so yeah...haha i nearly went down when they asked for accepters too, but again malu...haha. it really changed my life that time. finally i felt like a christian, changed and renewed rather than clinging on to some hypocritical front that kept "accepting" then back sliding, which i had been doing til then.
whee. but for a long time after that i was shaking, looking for another church and all--i even went for cheryl's church camp, and audrey's syfc stuff. then after the camp i realised i had to go back to orpc. yeap. now i seem to be looking again. *kicks self* just go fcbc or wm someday. get over yourself, laura.
i'm getting tired. spouting nonsense.
Posted by nayrakroarual at 11:04 PM
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